Tuesday, May 11


Do you ever wondering what you're doing with your life?  I have been lately.  Am I using my time effectively?  Am I making a positive impact on my world?  These are potentially not the best questions for a new mom to be mulling over...but then again, maybe they are.  There's a lot of stuff out there worth doing.  A lot of stuff that needs doing.  A lot of causes worthy of my time.

A lot of diapers that need changing.

A lot of laundry that needs doing.

A lot of bottles that need washing.

I know my job as a mom is important.  But every now and then, it's easy to think that it's not, and that there are plenty of other things I could be doing that would be more gratifying, and have a bigger impact on the world.  (I'm not really sure if this is about what I want to do, or about what is good for the wider world...probably both).  I want to do things that are fulfilling, that will use my brain, and that will have a positive impact on the world around me.  It's hard to see changing diapers and keeping the floor clean for my munchkin as achieving those ends...

I was thinking about this this morning.  And then I thought about my mom.  And I think, that just maybe, I can do both (be a mom, and do things that are fulfilling and have a positive impact).  Just maybe not at the same time.

When I was born, my mom was a hairdresser.  She stayed at home after I was born, and started working from home shortly after my sister was born.  She did hair until I was in junior high, but mostly, she was a full time mom.

And a really, really good one.

 I love that my mom was at home when I was a kid.  I love that when I was sick at school, she could be there within minutes.  I love that she made Halloween costumes, played with us, read with us.  Sure, it's selfish, but I love that she was pretty much 100% ours while we were growing up.  I think it's really important to have a parent wholly available while kids are young.  My mom was, and she was good at it.

Just before I started high school, mom started taking some courses at McMaster Divinity College.  A couple of general interest courses turned into a degree, and the year I graduated from highschool, my mom graduated with her Master's of Divinity (a big deal for someone who hadn't previously done any post-secondary education)!

Mom was ordained.  She's done some work pastoring, chaplaining, and has just started working as the Congregational Health Associate for Canadian Baptists of Ontario and Quebec.  She's doing great things - things that she's good at, that are important, and hopefully that are fulfilling.  I am so proud of her, and the things that she's doing right now.  I also relish her as an example of the possibilities that lay beyond the child-raising years.

A present parent was important to me as a child.  It's also important to me that I provide my children with that.  And on the days that I hit the hay wondering what good I did by changing diapers, it's helpful to remember the good it did me to have my mom around.  It's also helpful to see that now, my mom is embracing new and exciting challenges, doing things that are both good for her and for her community.  Likely, I too will someday have the opportunity to be more than 'mom.'  But for now, I will do my best to make the most of the mom years.  Hopefully Haydon will appreciate it as much as I appreciated having my mom around.

1 comment:

  1. Thanks Rachel... I needed that... some days I wonder if teaching the alphabet, reading stories, singing silly songs, kissing boo boo's, and keeping house (which isn't very good most days) is what I should be doing. But deep down I know... this time is precious, and my mom was there for all us kids too, and well I really appreciated that too. It doesn't reflect well in the bank account, but Rylan's heart account is overflowing!


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